Dreams

Sorry about not updating, despite me saying I would, but here's something.

So I feel like dreams and nightmares are a matter that have changed for me over time. Whatever they are, memories being pushed out, your mind playing tricks with you, I don't know. But one odd complaint I always here is about nightmares.

Really? At this point, I don't really have nightmares. Even the scariest parts of my dreams don't seem to phase me as much as I'd like anymore. But when I do have something that wakes me in the middle of the night/early morning, I actually wake up with a sigh of relief. I am happy I live in a world where these bad things don't happen, and therefore I guess you could say these are more blessings in disguise more than anything.

But what about good dreams? Those are the ones that people tend to think of when they want to sleep nicely during the night. There are the ones where you can fly, where you have superpowers, where you get to ask out that one cute girl you know and she says yes, maybe share a tender kiss (I mean, that's what I hear, anyways. It's not like I have those or anything. Uuuuhhhhh, just keep reading). But I always felt like these ones are also, in a sense, a little bit depressing. As soon as you wake up, there it is, that sense of reality, that sense that whatever happened in your dream isn't real. Maybe that's fine with some people, but I hate these kinds of dreams.

It's those dreams where good things are happening in a nonsensical wasteland, and while the things around you don't matter, what you're focusing on tends to be great. I'm not talking about "wet dreams" either, it's just sometimes nice to be able to hold someone close to you until your sleepiness wears out to tell you morning has arrived. I know people do all kinds of stuff to make their minds do these kinds of things, and while that sounds nice, it just feels like I'd be battling for control for my mind to be happy.

I don't know, this was just some random hogwash that I felt like talking about. I don't know if people really read these or nots, but it feels better to get some of these things out. Maybe other people share different opinions, and I would like to hear them, but for the time being, I do find my happier dreams as sad nothings that will never happen in my life, things I will never do, and girls I will never kiss. (Er, I mean, again, that's what I hear)

Update: June, the Month of Writing

Well, I haven't updated this poor  thing in what feels like forever. So I'm going to update it now. Yes, with the beginning of June, I have decided that I will do more writing, whether that's for my own story, or just on this blog for the sake of it. I have a couple things in mind to write about, so there's plenty of stuff to discuss.

I think the biggest thing right now is just forcing myself to get a proper outline of the first part of my story done (first book?). Figuring out how to put all these people together ain't easy, but I try my best. I suppose in general Summer is a time of relaxation for me, if only because I still need to find work. Since it's June and I still haven't found jack, I might as well do something with my abundance of time. It's a shame I haven't really done too much, but seeing friends and all that is pretty nice.

I think the next thing I'm going to write about is Digimon games. Seems like a silly thing to write about, but it'll help start the creative juices, or at least just get me back in the mood of writing. Generally, I find just writing about simple things like that will be helpful. I've been spending too much of my time and money on video games (the Steam Sale got plenty of dollars out of me, even if the stuff is pretty cheap, a decent amount of money still goes into it).

I've also been home alone for the week. It's been nice, but also a little weird I suppose. I don't really have anyone hanging over at my house, but I guess I'm treating this time more as alone time than anything. I feel like everyone needs a bit of that now and then, and it'll help get it out of my system before I start trying to do all this stuff again.

I have to admit, I am feeling better though. I feel like I started off this summer all down, but now I'm a little more positive, feeling fresh, and I'm sure I'm going to be able to do more. I just need to push myself. Look forward to more updates, my 0 followers.